The Time We Came in Twos
Testimony of a (Not So) Bygone Age
I grew up in the communist Eastern European block, behind the infamous Iron Curtain.
The deepest damage to our selves was maybe the necessity of duplication. The split between our private and our expressed selves.
Authority only seldom just suppresses. It also creates and imposes a desired self.
You were not a preschool kid — you were a motherland’s scout. Then, you became a pioneer, and later, a young communist. “Becoming” had a ceremony attached, a specific uniform, and a hierarchy. Later still, you were a mother, or a brave patriot, building the era of the New Citizen.
Self-detachment becomes the way to be.
First, you detach yourself from the propaganda-heavy words such as motherland, patriotism, the beloved leader, and you mock them with a wink; later, you mock integrity, empathy, solidarity, humanity, love.
First, you take a step back so you can live with the regime; later, you step back from any commitment.
When who you are and who you talk like are two different personas, in the long term, you stop knowing who is who — and which you should detach yourself from.
I wrote the piece below about the less crushing power plays in those times. It strikes me now, after publishing it, that every character has a protector, a chaperone, a sponsor. These people come in twos, I realise:
Power to the People
Gregory, the Minister of Civil Infrastructure, shows up unexpectedly one afternoon in the seaside auberge of the Artists National Syndicate. Despite the ‘no vacancies’ notice at the reception, he is provided with the best suite, always kept vacant for such cases.
He is Ella and Michael’s protector, and the magician who has arranged their suite here, since neither of them has anything to do with art. Not that Gregory does. But his connections.
This is so well written and the message is so powerful. I love this line in particular and could apply it to so many aspects of life today:
When who you are and who you talk like are two different personas, in the long term, you stop knowing who is who .
From a very different angle think about all the kids today who live on social media and have to present an image which might be very different than who they are. It is truly unhealthy to be and sound like two different people, and you made the point in the context of Eastern Europe ,and I can only imagine. But the larger point is true elsewhere. Very thought provoking.
Also loved the renaming: preschool kid — you were a motherland’s scout and other examples as well.